May 24, 2002. Well, this is it: home of the famous Full Moon Party. It's a beach party that takes place (oddly enough) during each full moon that doesn't coincide with some Buddhist occasion in which consumption of alcohol is prohibited throughout the country. Seems a little hippocritical to me, but no one here seems to mind.

So far, Ko Pha Ngan sucks a big one. It's expensive, it's dirty and I live in a shit hole (see picture below). Some people like this sort of thing, but I'm just not into the whole party scene. Drugs, booze and dancing haven't ever been things that I considered fun. So why am I here? Good question. I'll get back to you on that one.

This party is so hyped that I've got to see it for myself. Somehow I get the feeling that I'm going to be disappointed.

I went to the beach area earlier in the day and it was already nuts. People dancing and screaming on the sand. And the party isn't for another few days. It's the pre-party. Man, I'm in over my head.

Took me a while to find this stretch of beach that didn't have any party-goers on it, but it wasn't long before hooting and laughing shattered the peace.

May 25, 2002. You know, I did say I didn't like this place, but that was yesterday. As you can see, there are some parts of the island that haven't been infested with rowdiness. Also, it seems that we have graduated from bikini-clad German girls to topless Isreali girls. This place is really starting to grow on me.

I bought one of those island shirts, you know the ones that look like women's clothing? I don't mind cross dressing here, it helps me blend in with the locals.

The restaurants here aren't as good as the ones on Ko Tao, but they do offer a wide selection of fresh fish. As you can see, you can have the Jaws special. I'm not much for shark. Had it back in Canada once and it tasted like chicken.

Ever since Ko Tao, I haven't been able to track down any tuna and it's really getting me down. The waiters keep telling me that mackerel is just as good, but it's not. It's funny, I never even used to eat fish back in Canada.

Here's Abok after we found a good restaurant to eat at. It's a big deal, having a good meal. If you can't look at the sea while eating freshly grilled fish, what's the point of living? Abok taught me this.

There are lots of strays in Thailand, especially on the islands. Often, we'd get visitors at the table, begging for a few scraps of food.

The party really crowds out the island. There is adequate lodging for 5,000, but 8,000 people show up for the party. Elementary economics tells me that I am going to get raped on rent.

Because of the room shortage, Abok and I got rooms in two different places. I was closer to the party, near Hat Rin Nok (also called Sunrise beach), at a place called Anan Inn, but I had to live in this disgusting mess. No matter how much I tried to clean it and no matter how much I sprayed my cologne around the room, it still looked and smelled like a toilet. I don't know what possessed me to stay here.

Abok, ever the early riser, would come over to my place and shout through the door to wake me up while he had his morning smoke. I didn't notice until I was leaving the island that he never once stepped foot into my room.

May 26, 2002. There's really nothing to do here until the party starts (tomorrow night), so Abok and I decided to kill the day by taking a tour of the island. On the tour we met these two Isreali girls whose names I couldn't even hope to pronounce, let alone spell. 19 years old and straight out of the army.

Man, if this is what Isreali soldiers looks like then we definitely need to declare war and get the entire damn army into this country. All in all, it was a nice tour. I saw a guy narrowly miss getting hit by a falling coconut. They provide great shade, but they will pound you into the dirt with their fruit.

Also on the tour: This is what they use to catch octopi. I don't know how it works, or why you would even want to catch one, but that's how they do it here.

They wait until night time to sail out. Once in a prime spot, they extend those crane-like arms mounted on the boat and shine them into the water. The octopi are attracted to this for some reason and all you have to do is scoop 'em up.

May 27, 2002. Well today's the day of the big party. It's finally arrived, I can't wait for it to be over so I can get off this damn island and get to Ko Samui already. I'm blonde and I cut my foot while snorkelling yesterday. My shitty rental mask was leaky, so I tried to find a place to stand while I attempted to repair it. Razor sharp coral might have been a bad choice.

This is the fried chicken guy, near Hat Rin Noi (also called Sunset beach) where Abok was staying. This man had the best fried chicken on the island. We ate there at least two or three times a day (which sounds like a lot, but it wasn't. We'd eat five meals a day in Thailand).

There were still a few hours to kill before sunset (when the party starts), so I decided to go for a Tai Chi lesson while Abok got a massage. Unfortunately, the Tai Chi instructor was in the Netherlands, so I settled for a qi gong lesson instead.

Party time. Oooh baby, I love this shot! A big beef cake of a man got his freak on with Abok's ass. He didn't even know that the guy was there. We had a good laugh about it later, but I'm guessing that Abok would have danced with a lot more women if not for Beefcake. More party pics below.

May 28, 2002. Early morning. I am one of the survivors. There aren't many of us. I'm so tired that I could fall asleep on the beach (as Abok has), but I won't for fear that someone will pee or vomit on me. The only reason I am still up is because I want to see the sun rise.

The party is still going and it's a little past 6 am. I can't believe that people still have the capacity to dance and drink after what went on last night. It was so crazy, I never want to do anything like it again. I'll just cross that off my list of Things To Do Before I Die and leave it at that.

We considered staying for another day or so, since the rent would definitely come down and it'd be a lot quieter, but there's really nothing to do here so we bolted. At the pier there were a few hundred other people with the same idea. Where the hell is the boat? It was supposed to be here 20 minutes ago. Where am I, Fiji?

Oh here it is, half an hour late. Typical Thailand. Looks like I'm not the only one who's anxious to get off this island.

On to Ko Samui for our next adventure.